Sunday, May 13, 2012

What's the Story?

For years, before I taught yoga, I worked as a nanny.

I sort of fell into it & for the most part, I loved it.  I was paid extremely well, had great health benefits & took care of wonderful children.  I spent my "work" day at the beach or the was way better than any other job I previously had.

But there was a big back story behind being a nanny.  I had fallen into the work, but only because I had ended a relationship, lost a job & had to start over.  It was a back story filled with hurt & anger.

When I would meet people & they would ask "so, what do you do?".  And I would answer "I'm a nanny...  but..."  And then I would go on to tell them how I had gone to College, worked in Social Services & Event Planning & how I pretty much just landed in this job without planning it.  I felt I was being judged for my job choice & that I needed to justify it, & my abilities, to complete strangers.

At some point, I stopped caring what strangers thought about my job choice.  At some point, I became confident about what I did, the reasons why I did it & why I liked it so much.  At some point I let go of the hurt & anger & the history that had led me to being a nanny & I just embraced what I was doing.

At some point, I realized I was writing the story & it didn't have to be one of hurt & anger & justification anymore.  I closed the book on the old story & started to write a new one. 

Sure, there were people who walked away from me when I told them what I did, but that was their story.  The choice to feel judged & the need to justify - that was all me.  I realized that every time I brought up the back story, I was re-writing it.  In the same way.  Over & over again.  And in the process, giving it more power & energy.    

I periodically meet people who are still writing & rewriting the same old story.  A story of hurt, or deception, wrong-doing - real or perceived.  They are focusing their energy on what has happened in the past & they keep sticking with the same story.  And every time they tell that story, they bring up that old, negative energy.

 It took me quite a while to realize that's what I was doing.  Writing & re-writing the same old story.  Giving power to the past & bringing up that negative energy. 

That was all before yoga.

It was Yoga that helped me realize that I could close the book on the old story & start writing a new one any time I wanted.  With each new day...with each new moment even.  The old story may have been powerful, but my ability to write a new one gives me the power in this moment.

What's your story?  Are you stuck in the past - giving it power over the present?  Writing & re-writing? 

What good things are happening in your life right now?  What great things are about to happen?   

What story do you want to write?

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